Monday 30 June 2008

Writing using definitions instead of words is hard.

In case that; granting or supposing that; on condition that the pronoun of the second person singular or plural, used of the person or persons being addressed, in the nominative or objective case, have or form in the mind as an idea, conception, (to indicate a person, thing, idea, state, event, time, remark, etc., as pointed out or present, mentioned before, supposed to be understood, or by way of emphasis) a large number, quantity, or amount of anything (used to indicate possession, connection, or association), of nonsense, falsehood drivel or the like (third person singular present indicative) of whatever or whichever it may be, satisfactory in quality, quantity or degree, then please have or form in the mind as an idea, conception in an additional case or instance furthermore, (a form of the possessive case of “I” used as an attributive adjective) person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

Saturday 28 June 2008

My beautifully cracked mirror. (Edit)

Don't think, just ***** eh? Don't think. Do not think. Think? No thanks. I don't think, thank you very much. Properly dresdenized as far as ************** is concerned. Black dogs ************ black mirrors. Razed and flattened. Crawling through the rubble. Look at my hands. ********* Oil and blood - very meta fucking ********. I can look in a million directions, but only follow one path. I am *********, but can't. Crawl on, that *****. ********* me over the top, whistle me down a wind. Blow baby blow. Exhale, inhale. And repeat. That's the ******, the secret, the ********* truth, the turd in the lucky dip. Creeping, ********* to the top of the rollercoaster. Struggling upwards. Screaming down. And repeat. In through the nose, out through the *********. Or vice-versa. Mind like a ransom note. ************ cut and pasted. Strings of plasticine squeezed together until they become one. One malleable *****. I wish my mind was a stainless ***** ****. "I ****"? WISH? If wishes were ****** I could remember the end of the saying. How fucking ********. Don't wish, just..... what? What? Children can wish *** * ****, but when you're ********** wishing is just ************ onanism. Turn on, tune in, and miss the ********. Miss it. Missed.Hey, the grass is greener **********? Always greener, softer, more **********, more fragrant and always where you're not. What sort of a ******* is that? **** the saying, **** the sentiment. Can you see? Can you? ********** is reflected on the back of my eye. In my ******. My beautifully cracked mirror. Be grateful **** ********, otherwise I might see things as they really are.

Friday 20 June 2008


Well, it's a little shamefacedly that I return to the blog that has been so wantonly neglected for the last couple of weeks. Excuses? None. Sheer bloody laziness on my part. So what's new? Well, a few things actually...


1 Toys. Toys acquired include a new phone (bog standard Nokia 6500) which was ought from
Three so that I could get a broadband dongle for £4 a month. Whizzy it is. Simply plug it into yer lapdog, and bingo - t'interweb access wherever you go. Works pretty well too - all the drivers are pre-installed in it, so it really is plug and play. connection speed ain't broadband, but it's good enough. Top toy. Next new toy is a Mazda Bongo - following the untimely demise of our much loved campervan, Bluebell I decided to put all my eggs in one basket, and go for a "one vehicle solution" for the household. So farewell then Jeep, hello Billy Bongo. I'll post a pic as son as I get it - it's a fresh import from Japan, so it's taking a while to register it with the DVLA.


2 Jobs. I was about to say "it all seems to be going pretty well on the job front" but that seems like tempting fate, so let's say that it hasn't all turned to ordure yet. Consultancy is up to 3 days per week, bottles are coming along very slowly, and I seem to have over committed myself by agreeing to do some "sweat equity" work for a couple of startups. All of which means that I've been pretty flat out over the last couple of weeks.


3 Life. Life is good. Had a bit of a moan the other day when we were informed that the Levellers gig at Harewood House was cancelled, but then we were offered tickets to "A Beautiful Day Out" at Arley Hall, which means that not only do we get to see the Levellers, but also Seth Lakeman, Dreadzone, Chumbawumba and 3 Daft Monkeys. Result. Also had a top weekend on the boat, along the Leeds-Liverpool Canal to Dowley Gap, nice two day trip, nice pub, nice nosh, top one all round. (Apart from the puncture on the Jeep at 7pm on Sunday night when we were wanting to be getting home). Mucho looking forward to Thornborough Festival too.


4 Head. Not sure on this one, I've missed out on my last 2 counselling sessions, because of one thing or another, so I haven't had the time set aside to gaze into my navel - but on the sanity meter I must be doing pretty well - for the last couple of nights I've actually fallen asleep at night rather than dropped unconscious due to self medication. But overall I seem to be on an even keel at the moment.


5 Weirdness. Lots. Don't know if this is the time of year for it, but seems to all around - in my head and out of it. As an example, I woke this morning having had a very vivid dream about having to explain myself out of a tricky situation in the style of William Topaz McGonagall. What's that all about then? Eh?


6 Fashion. After a short but intriguing discussion with the PaintMonkey, I am decided to change my style. I think that I will be spending more time in the charity shops searching for the "Isembard Kingdom Brunel meets Edwardian Gentleman with a nod towards Steampunk" look.
What Ho!